14 June 2017

It's getting pretty late, so let's sum this up quickly. That scary matryoshka doll is composed entirely of the dead-eyed gaze of alt-right lawn jockey Jeff Sessions, who testified before Congress yesterday, had his fragile little feelings hurt, refused to answer many questions because, well, we don't really know why, he didn't offer any rational explanation for the refusal, and then he acted shocked---shocked!---that anybody would find it even the least bit suspicious that he had all sorts of secret meetings with Russian government officials that he then didn't tell the Senate about during his confirmation hearings. Oh, and this morally bankrupt nitwit also thinks that marijuana is a tool of the devil. So, you know, classy guy all around.

13 June 2017

Apparently a couple of hack right wing news sites got their tighty-whiteys in a bunch over a production of Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar" because the guy playing Caesar was made up to resemble Trump. I know, it's terrible. The right wing media already has so much to deal with---transgender bathroom usage, the war on christmas, statues of slave owners being dismantled in the South---and collectively they have the emotional control of a three-year-old, and now we're asking them not to freak out over this nonissue. It's our fault, really. We all should've known better.

12 June 2017

That orb in the center started out as a soccer ball before it morphed into some sort of portly easter egg. These things happen. #ResistMarch was on full display above the fold today, and we'll honor that here, because it's nice to honor nice things.

11 June 2017

I don't know if it's a sign that summer has officially begun or we've just hit upon a natural ebb in this year's relentless, churning news cycle, but today's front page offered something like a breather from the near-constant state of high anxiety that has existed, it seems, since January 20. Mostly we were given the science (still respected in some quarters!) of snow pack measurements and an architecture piece on Frank Lloyd Wright's pre-Columbian LA houses. I mean, there was terrorism and "Trump is an idiot" stuff, but it was kind of off to the side, as if the front page was like, "You know what? It's Sunday morning. Grab a cup of coffee, maybe a second danish, and read some shit that'll make you feel, for at least a little while, like you don't live in secular humanist End Times." And, you know, if that's not your bag, then you probably went to #ResistMarch today. Either way, I hope you had that second danish. #priorities

10 June 2017

The front page was a hot mess of hot messes today. I mean, it doesn't get much more gross than the mention of both Trump and Roman Polanski on the same page. All I could think was, "If only there was a weird, musical, multisyllabic word that could sum up all these shitty news items. And maybe give them a veneer of fun while we're at it." And so we have what you're looking at. Not quite a spoonful of sugar, but it'll get us through the night.

9 June 2017

I know we all have Comey fever right now, but we also need to acknowledge the elephant in the room. A shitty, backstabbing elephant no less, in the form of the House Republicans passing a bill on Thursday that would repeal vital parts of the 2010 Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act. Remember that bill? That's the one that was passed after the great financial clusterfuck of 2008, in order to prevent banks from behaving like reckless, profit-driven idiots. It also set up a consumer protection bureau, which has been responsible for recouping billions of dollars in refunds for consumers who were screwed by shady bank practices. So, you know, totally not doing anybody any good.

8 June 2017

How about that Comey testimony (or, as I like to call it, "testicomey")? It's like that gold coin nailed to the mast in "Moby Dick": there seem to be as many interpretations of it as there are political affiliations.  Still, we all want to know one thing: does it help move us closer to impeachment? Lordy, I hope it does.