Monday, May 29, 2017

29 May 2017

Clearly the front page knows what you're all doing with your time off this Memorial Day: A1 was dominated by articles about weed, Netflix, and doughnuts.  I mean, that last one was technically about the boxes that the doughnuts are sold in, but you get the point. Anyhow, let's all take the rest of the day off from the really grim stuff (North Korea missile launches, Jared Kushner's sleazy backroom dealings with Russia), because it'll all be waiting for us tomorrow.

Sunday, May 28, 2017

28 May 2017

Yes, that is my poor attempt at Gregg Allman, who died on Saturday, tucked in among all those heads of cauliflower. If you don't know who Gregg Allman is, or why you should care, go listen to this version of Whipping Post they did at the Fillmore East. And then go listen to this 23 minute version of Whipping Post that appeared on the live album made from that series of concerts. And then, I don't know, go enjoy your Memorial Day weekend.

Saturday, May 27, 2017

27 May 2017

Sometimes the best part of an article is a minor detail embedded within the larger story. In the story about the Islamic state's use of drones in combat, there's a paragraph  describing a variety of measures the good guys are undertaking to foil their use since they are notoriously difficult to shoot out of the sky in a normal fashion. Among the more prosaic solutions mentioned was a scheme to train eagles to hunt drones. Which, I don't know about you, but the idea of eagles flying around beating the shit out terrorist drones sounds like something from an Archer episode, i.e., it's something i think we all need to see via goPro strapped to said Eagles of Drone Death. The focus of today's mixed media daily drawing is not that story, however. There were some domestic developments to consider/get very angry about. More details of Trump's "make America fucked again" budget are emerging, and among the many, many items under the axe are California's and Alaska's early warning earthquake system, warning systems for tornados, and an array of DART buoys stationed in all bodies of water surrounding our once-great nation that can detect tsunamis. So never mind early warning for normal, non-Trump citizens, but make sure there's plenty on money to keep melania in New York City. That's your president's priorities. He's happy to watch all of you die so that he does not have to live in the same house as his wife.

Friday, May 26, 2017

26 May 2017

You can just see the second panel, can't you? Where she's pouring that big glass of Chardonnay or whatever the fuck it is all over tiny sleazy trump's tiny toupee (or whatever the fuck it is), because of the Manchester leaks or the shitty attitude at the NATO meeting or just because he's exactly the kind of douchebag that needs a tall glass of something thrown on him once in a while, just to keep him in line. Of course, British Prime Minister Theresa May did not pour a drink on Trump's head, but if she did I bet the rest of NATO would throw her a goddamn ticker tape parade. Especially this guy.

Thursday, May 25, 2017

25 May 2017

I felt a little bad that the last time I drew Pope Francis his face was obscured by one half of a pair of dice, so I made sure to include him today. We can hope that some of his kinder, gentler papal wisdom rubbed off on national embarrassment Donald J. Trump when the two met, but let's be real: Trump is a raging narcissist and an utter fool, and his only thought on meeting anybody is how he can use that person for his own gain. I imagine it was all just a fabulous photo op for him. I wonder if somewhere in Trump's dim, flickering synapses he was able to realize, when he came face to face with the pontiff, that this is as close to heaven as he will ever get.

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

24 May 2017

England would have been the focus today regardless, but Roger Moore's improbable appearance on the front page (he died recently) sort of put a weird spin on the whole thing. With everything that's going on in the world, the romanticization of National spy organizations and their stateless supervillain nemeses really feels like something from the most bygone of eras.

Tuesday, May 23, 2017

23 May 2017

All eyes are on Manchester today, of course, because some lowlife zealot decided that god wanted him to blow up children. Despite ISIS' best efforts to be the biggest asshole on the front page today, a photo of Trump touching the Western Wall is what appeared above the fold. I guess ancient masonry can't jerk its hand away when you reach out for a little suggestive rub, so it makes for a somewhat normal official photo. Oh yeah, and the White House released something it thinks is a budget today, but it's actually just a whole lot of wishful conservative thinking swaddled in incorrect math. In other words, it's one ugly baby.