There are all kinds of totally fucked up things going down (like this and this and this), but we're in LA, baby, and we're gonna talk about carpets. Specifically, the red one that leads entertainment industry workers to Oscar glory, if they be so lucky. To be honest, the LA Times front page carpet story is a genuinely fun, informative, industry town type of article---who makes this thing? how is this thing installed? how do they prevent people from stealing bits of the thing and selling it on ebay? There's a great bit in the beginning that locates the origins of the red carpet in Aeschylus' "Agamemnon," wherein the titular greek king is offered a celebratory red carpet by his lady Clytemnestra upon his return from the Trojan War. And then she kills him. Ah, the Greeks. If only they had invented stories that could resonate with modern audiences, they would totally be remembered today. Like Nathan E. Douglas.
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